The Humble Cudgel is a unique Lead Pipe that can be found inside the sewers below New Vegas. Obtaining the weapon completes the unmarked quest “Cajoling a Cudgel”.

A few quick tips before you go explore the sewers:

• Maze-like layout. The sewers are incredibly difficult to navigate due to their labyrinthian layout. Make sure to follow the guide thoroughly to ensure that you don’t get lost.
• Collector’s item. The Humble Cudgel is not a useful weapon. It’s so hard to acquire that most players don’t even know of its existence, and it doesn’t have any useful properties. 

For a frame of reference, it has a lower DPS than the Machete Gladius, an easy-to-get, non-unique melee weapon.

Acquisition

To get this item, start by going to Camp McCarran, located south of the New Vegas Strip.

Once there, you’ll find a manhole that you can enter that leads into a sewer. Go inside.

You can use the local map to make it a bit easier to navigate.

Luke’s Key

Start by exiting the area you spawn in. Remember this place, as you’ll be returning here later.

Turn right and follow the corridor.

Skip all of the turns found in the first room you find yourself in and keep going north.

You’ll pass by more turns, but ignore all of them. Keep going north, up a slope, until you see a door with red lights on your left.

You’ll come across a pile of rubble. At that point, look to your left. You’re going to see a door illuminated by red lights. Go through that door.

Inside you’ll find the corpse of a prospector, with a key labeled “Luke’s Find” on it.

Loot the key and return to where you entered the sewers.

Sealed Sewers

You can find the Sealed Sewers by going west of the place where you entered the sewers.

Be wary, as the entrance to the Sealed Sewers is guarded by 10 or so Fiends. The Sealed Sewers themselves are guarded by an about equal number of Feral Ghouls and Glowing Ones.

Start by turning left instead of right at the entrance, going up the slope instead of down.

Keep following the corridor west until you see a turn to your left, illuminated by red lights.

Enter through the illuminated door.

You’ll enter a mostly empty room with a door in the far left corner. Go through that door to continue.

Go up the metal staircase in the back left corner of the following room.

On the second floor, you’ll see a door next to a broken drainage pipe – that door is locked by the key you found on the prospector. Go through that door to enter the Sealed Sewers.

Go up the stairs.

You’ll Ghouls and Glowing Ones flood out of a door located in the back left part of the room you enter. Kill the Ghouls and go through that door.

In the center of this room, you’ll find another dead prospector. They have the weapon on them. Loot it and leave the sewers.

Comparing The Humble Cudgel to the Lead Pipe

• The Humble Cudgel deals more damage (26 damage vs 22 damage).
• The Humble Cudgel deals more critical hit damage (26 critical damage vs 22 critical damage).
• The Humble Cudgel attacks faster (2.77 attacks/second vs 2.54 attacks/second).
• It has an approximately 50% higher durability (370 attacks before breaking vs 245 attacks before breaking).

Gameplay Tips

• This weapon is most likely intended as a joke. 
• Chance’s Knife, a weapon you can easily get at level 1, is superior in basically every single way. Our guide on acquiring Chance’s Knife can be found here.